I have always hated the Boston accent.
I think because a lot of people I don’t like have it.
I know the problem with hating local accents.
I get it.
But I think I’m allowed to hate the sound of my own voice
when I’m angry or drunk
and I drop my r’s.
my mother says
the boston accent
isn’t an accent, really,
but an attitude.
“come ahn, ked”
“pahk ya cah” and all that.
it’s angry, it’s drunk
just like me
when it comes out of my mouth.
i already feel gangly and too big
(though I’m only 5’2).
I already don’t like to be noticed in person.
I only like my words to be noticed
when they are printed
and handed over silently.
i want people to read my words
and hear their own voice
i want to be invisible.
i hate my accent.
“you don’t even have an accent.”
everybody has an accent.
even when i’m not drunk or angry
people at college knew where i was born.
i’ll never be free of this place.
my tongue remains a prisoner.
at least my fingers are free.