Candles

It’s often hard for me to stop thinking. I go in circles. I worry. About everything.

I have to make sure I have enough time to buy chips for the party, because if I don’t buy chips there won’t be any salty snacks, but what if there are too many people for just one bag of chips? What if I don’t have time to buy chips? I have to make sure I have enough time to buy chips, so there’s some salty snacks.

And so on, except it’s usually about more important things than chips. Like, my career. My future. My family.

I get the thoughts to stop the same way you get a song out of your head. If you have a song in your head, you listen to the song and it goes away. If I have a worry in my head, I go through the worrisome situation and it goes away. Saying “Stop!” to myself helps for a moment, but then the thoughts come back like a stubborn case of hiccups.

The less-effective way to make it stop is by telling myself “Who cares?”

There won’t be any salty snacks for the party. Who cares?

And et cetera.

I am glad that I have things that keep me occupied and don’t make me worry. Like blogging. And drawing. Creative writing. And lighting candles.

I love lighting candles. Nothing makes me feel calmer. I love watching the flame dance, I love the smell of the room when they’re lit. I love the color of the wax. I love candles. I can see why they’re used with meditating.

The candles make me feel like everything’s alright, even if there’s no salty snacks. Even if no one cares.

5 best quotes for introverts who feel bad that they just had to escape

Hey, every introvert has been there. An overwhelming party, parents asking too many questions, stressful assignments piling up…sometimes, an introvert just needs to escape and be alone. I tend to find a locked room and just sit in silence awhile, enjoying the quiet darkness. Others like plugging into music or getting sucked into a book or movie. Some knit, or play an instrument, or ride a bike for awhile. Whatever your escape, here are five quotes to assure you that escaping now and then is totally okay.

  1. Sometimes when you’re overwhelmed by a situation-when you’re in the darkest of darkness- that’s when your priorities are reordered. ~Phoebe Snow

There are some positives to stress. Many people work better with a looming deadline. However, when it becomes overwhelming, we reorder our priorities by escaping; by taking a few minutes to recharge, we are putting ourselves and our sanity at the top of our priorities list. Sometimes remembering to put ourselves first helps us handle everything else on our plate.

  1. I don’t think we realize just how fast we go until you stop for a minute and realize just how loud and how hectic your life is, and how easily distracted you can get. ~Meg Ryan

Extroverts and introverts alike can benefit from taking a few minutes to breathe. It’s helpful to remember that everyone, not just you, has a limit.

  1. The more powerful and original a mind, the more it will incline towards the religion of solitude. ~Aldous Huxley

There are lots of very smart, very successful introverts. Our love of solitude helps us stay focused on personal projects and achieve more when alone than extroverts, who work best in groups. While I would hesitate to say that either introverts or extroverts are better than the other, it is nice to remember than introversion is not a fault, and can be a trait of a powerful and original mind.

  1. I can only really and truly fully relax on my own. Give me a sun lounger, a pool and a sea view, and I’m happy. ~Miranda Hart

Again, you’re not alone. It’s hard to keep up appearances, to be “on” for long periods of time. And that’s okay. It’s okay to be happiest and most relaxed when alone.

  1. Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and that there’s got to be a way through it ~Michael J. Fox

Most of all, fellow introverts, I want you to accept yourself for who you are. Needing to leave a party for a few minutes (or not going at all) is nothing to be ashamed of. You’re not antisocial: you’re an introvert, and you’re not alone for wanting to be alone.