Wednesdays

I don’t mind Wednesdays. They’re right in the middle of things, and once you do it you only have two days left, right?

I’ve been trying to change this mentality. I don’t want to live for the weekend, especially since I spend most weekends working on school work anyway. It’s a cultural thing, I think–ever since grade school people have been looking forward to Friday, and we loved school back then. Well, at least I did.

It’s not a good feeling to have 5/7 of your days be days you don’t want to live.

I’ve been doing better with depression and anxiety, but I’ve had a bit of a setback recently. Maybe it’s a spring thing; some people clean ther attic, I fall into depression. 

I don’t know why it’s come back, and maybe there’s no reason. Sometimes it’s for no reason. I can’t help but think of reasons, though. I’m over stressed, as if that’s something new. I’m worried about my birthday, and the party that will have both sides of my newly divorced family in the same house for the first time in…years, wow, it’s been nearly two years. I’m worried about finding a job for the summer, one that pays but still lets me relax a bit more than I am now. 

The worst thing about returning depression is that just the fact that it’s returning is another reason to get depressed.

So, in spirits of fighting away the oncoming doom, I will love Wednesday like it’s Saturday. I’ll take the day’s hardships in stride. Today shall be a day I want to experience, and I’ll stay mindful and present and as happy as I can be.

Worst comes to worst, there’s only two days left.

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Motivation

I am a firm believer that the more time you have, the less gets done. I have seen this proven dozens of times–I can rush out a ten page paper if it’s due tomorrow, but if it’s due in a week it’ll take me forever, or I’ll procrastinate, or whatever.

I am moving back to Boston tomorrow. Allston, actually. Usually I’d be super prepared, but between all the hours of doing nothing I hadn’t had the time.

Since I’ve gotten back from the Netherlands, nearly a whole month has passed. What do I have to show for it? …nothing. I feel like a lump. I haven’t accomplished a single thing except binge-watching seven seasons of Archer, taking care of the dog, and reading one book. I’ve barely written, and certainly haven’t packed. I’ve been putting off so many things, just because I can.

Soon, it will all change. I’ve excited for the tonal whiplash to encompass my life. I’m ready to be working my ass off again. I’m ready for class, internship, work, homework–work hard, play hard, right?

…I just need to find the motivation to actually do these things. I gotta stop being so lazy!

Okay. 1, 2, 3, lets go.

Every Worthy Act Is Difficult. Ascent Is Always Difficult. Descent Is Easy and Often Slippery – Mahatma Gandhi

Check out my post on TheSeeds4Life: http://www.theseeds4life.com/every-worthy-act-difficult-ascent-always-difficult-descent-easy-often-slippery-mahatma-gandhi.